I have been really struggling with being the godly wife and mother that I know I should be. I just want to cry about my sinfulness. I am such a wicked person. I do all the proper “things” to put a good face on, but in reality, I am as sinful as they come. I am prideful, full of hypocrisy. I want so badly to be a good example to my children, especially my daughter, of how a godly wife and mom should be, but I fail so miserably. I know that is because I do not immerse myself in His holy Word.
There, it is out for all to see. I don’t read the Scripture regularly, I don’t have personal devotions, I don’t meditate on His Word. I push through every day going through the motions, cleaning house, reading emails, doing computer work (AHG, APHEA, Friday School, looking up recipes, learning new “tools” for cooking, gardening, etc.) instead of getting up and DOING something productive, justifying my time on the computer.
So, with that said, I am getting off the computer and going to DO. I am going to try to make myself accountable on this blog, by posting what I have been reading in the Scripture, and what it means to me.
If anyone actually does read this, pray for me. And thank you for bearing with me as I work through this struggle.